Out of Darkness Shines the Light

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(let the silliness of the season commence!)

Happy Yuletide everyone!  I’m just drinking some hot chocolate out of a penguin cup as you do on the longest night of the year.

The past week I’ve been heavy in thought.  I’ve been highly introspective and analyzing the root of all of my insecurities and baggage.  Yeah, talk about a heavy undertaking and around the holidays, too!  Why do I do such things to myself?  Lol!  For some reason, I feel this compulsion; an impetus to purge all my issues… if that makes any sense.  Anyway, getting to the core and letting go of what holds me back will be awesome in the long run.  Perhaps the mental discomfort and emotional discontent are just symptoms of my transformation; I’ll get through this and emerge as a kick-ass butterfly.  At least one can hope.  Just like the winter solstice, it’s death of the darkness to give birth to the light.  Looking forward to a brighter 2017 indeed.  My low self esteem and old childhood wounds are still a recurring theme even after all of these years.  So frustrating.  So at this time, I’m trying to keep in mind to be gentle with myself and not to be such a perfectionist.  I have been improving and honing myself over the decades and a bad day(s) does not equate failure.  Yes, my super ego is an asshole, lol.  I need to give it love even when it’s “saying” such horrible things.  And that’s the big goal of the coming year… show love to everyone… no matter what.  Easier said than done indeed… it’s instinctual to react to hostility with hostility, and hurtfulness with defensiveness.  Hard to remember that this 3rd dimensional drama on this blue sphere is just an illusion.  At our essence, we are beings of love and light, not our physical form, and not the pain (and reactions to such pain) we’ve gathered in our lives.  So not only do I want to view people as loving beings that are merely bogged down by the illusions of “reality”, but I need to be gentle with MYSELF and view MYSELF as a light being having a human experience as well.  At least that’s the plan, lol.  Like most things in life, it’s a work in progress.

So what about you, lovely people out there?  What darkness are you carrying around?  Where in your life could you show compassion… to others AND yourself?  Time to accept our pain and darkness and love ourselves through it… for the light is about to get brighter!

Happy Yule!  And have a Happy Holiday of your choosing.  Enjoy a cup of cheer and look forward to an even better new year!

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Positive Highlights During a Crazy Ass 2016

Wow, it’s December!

2016 has gone by quickly, and simultaneously can’t be over soon enough!  There’s been a lot of crazy crap happening this year for many, it seems, and tensions are high.

But let’s forget about that for a bit…

Think of something that makes you happy, something that you enjoy doing, something makes you smile… anything that has shone some light for you during this challenging year.

I’ll go first 😉

I’m so thankful and appreciative for the friends and family in my life, my PTSD fading out and being practically non-existent the past few months, having the opportunities to be more social and meeting new people, creating art and bringing my sketchbook with me as a habit again, and thinking more positively in general.  I’m grateful for where I am and how I’m feeling.  I am so very happy and looking forward to what’s next for me.

So how about you, my lovelies?  What gives you joy, excitement, and appreciation?  Let’s share a moment together as fellow inhabitants of the Big Blue Ball Drama.  (And yes, I have some joke about blue balls in my head right now because that’s how my mind works.  I know have a problem, but I enjoy it way too much.  Anyway, I was talking about positivity and stuff…)

I spread love and joy to you all… via the inter-webs 😉

(and drawings to be posted soon, I promise!)